Let the Twisted Prevail!!!!

So I am taking a Children's Literature class at the local college and I love it....so far. I am sitting in a classroom and realizing that I could mother to almost all of them, except for one other student and the teacher, and slowly see that this is a class that must be required for elementary education. They are all budding teachers and my stomach drops because I am there to learn about children's lit. I want to write kids books but the teacher keeps referencing classroom strategies and what you can do with this in the classroom.... I am feeling very out of place and then I had an ah-ha moment. I decided to heck with all of them...I am here to get what I need from this class and they can like it or not. I don't care. This would be a very good example of a person who goes into a situation with a preconceived impression. This is not that classroom anymore. We were all to do a presentation on our favorite book for kids and I was torn. Should I go safe and be fake or should I be myself and risk the looks? It brought back memories of when I was a young mom and trying to find common interests with the other moms. I didn't fit in to begin with because I worked full time so I couldn't be there all the time for them. That was the first thing but then my point of view was different on rules and what my girls could do. I had decided that everything was ok and I would address what they weren't allowed to do if it created a problem. I guess this was not a normal way of raising a kid but I didn't want to be the rule monger. I didn't want to be the parent that controlled their child but instead wanted them to develop as they needed to....of course with gentle nudging in certain directions. They were, in turn, the children that were always allowed over at friends houses, invited to go on trips and sleepovers but other kids were not allowed at my house. I thought this was not fair....you see my girls and how they are...what makes you think that they are different at home? I felt dejected and defeated and finally gave up. I never did have the friendships I desired, the one where you raise your kids together and watch them grow while you sit and drink coffee and gossip. That was not in the cards for me but now I see that it wasn't supposed to be. Everyone has a life that they are to live. With that life they are supposed to learn, grow and hopefully teach one other person that it is ok to be different. It is normal to not be like everyone else and to be different, while it may be risky, it will work for you in the end. You just have to grow into the person that you are and it may take years before you get there. I am so glad that I risked the looks because it ended up working in my favor. I got up before the class, explained that I had gifted kids and was challenged early on to find age appropriate material that was for an advanced reader. I shared how our family had a dry and witty sense of humor and often it was dark and then I pulled out "There's a Hair in my Dirt" by Gary Larson of the Far Side fame. It was a total hit and right on the money. For the first time I felt like I wasn't a freak and didn't have to second guess my actions. I detailed how the book had one side of the page as cute and happy and then on the other side of the page it was sarcastic but educational with details about nature and facts that could be shared. In the end the teacher stopped and explained to the class that this is a big challenge for teachers and there is a need for higher level reading with kid themes. Winner winner chicken dinner!

Bitches Mannnn.......

One of the beautiful features of being older should be knowing what you want and being able to voice your opinion. I voice mine often and, while most times the outcome is positive, there are times that I offend on accident. I would have to say that it is because people are just too damn sensitive. I don't really want to live in a world where I have to worry about every little thing I say or do for fear that I may hurt someone's feelings or say the wrong thing. I have often said that I don't make a good friend to girls because I will not lie to them. I don't believe a friendship should be built on false words and you can never really trust a friend until you don't second guess yourself when you have spoken the truth. Women always have to put their two cents into a conversation, yes I am guilty as charged, but men speak the truth until a woman gets a hold of them. Women highly undervalue men and what they have to offer. Men are happy with silence. Women have to fill it with noise. You can walk with a man and not say a word while being content but a woman has to talk about her day and who said what to whom. I wonder why that is? We say that men are dumb and can't do anything right but I think it is women that just don't get it. There is nothing wrong with being quiet and just enjoying the moment. Sit back and observe then when someone says something that intrigues you...you share your thoughts and then sit back. It is genius. No wonder women accuse men of never listening...they don't know what is important enough to listen to if there is a constant jumble of words.

That being said I hate women who trap men into believing they deserve the crappy treatment they are getting. I have a front row ticket to the show and it is just sickening what a woman can do to a man if she has the mind to. I spent the better part of my day supporting my friend and taping up his broken heart because SHE can't take care of her shit! She feels that he is not being supportive of her by neglecting to offer her money. Why? Three months of dating means that they are supposed to just hand over cash cuz you ask them to? And why is it such a bad thing for him to have said no based on that fact? He has been condemned to suffer the texting wrath of a crazy bitch who can't pay her own way in life. It is so sad! One bad seed ruins it for so many....

I told him that to be a unit you have to each be individuals first and that means paying your way in life. If you start into a relationship simply because you think your money worries will go away then what does that say about you as a person? Wouldn't you much rather enjoy knowing that you have got your own back and when things get tough, while they may really suck, you will at least muddle through? I think so! This girl does.

I remember a time, not so long ago, where my love moved her for me and didn't find work for almost a year. While I understood his situation, and worked very hard to not stress him out, it was a difficult transition but he still contributed in so many other ways. There may have been a time where I wished I didn't have work so hard (full time job, part time job for insurance and school 3/4 time) but I always knew I had support from him. I knew that he would do the same for me if I was in his shoes and it made it easier to handle. We joked about his being my wife due to his mad domestic skills but I always knew the limit. I imagined that it must be hard for him not to be able to help the way he wanted and kept the lines of communication open. We had some fights but we made it through it fine. Now he is employed and doing well but we are still on that equal level when it comes to contributing to the life we are building together. I have always said you can't be a we until you are a whole person first. Any other way just brings chaos to the table and heads will start to roll. Then the blame game starts and noone likes that game!